Many of us are struggling to find the balance between home, work and family life. Professional and personal battles over your time can get downright nasty. Before you are given an ultimatum over your career, marriage or family, make sure your priorities are straightened out.
Don’t buy into the hype that you can only have one or the other. It’s time to exercise some degree of healthy selfishness and balance all three. Career, marriage and family are all incredibly important to your mental and spiritual health.
Your desires dictate how every part of your world should be prioritized, and how the parts should interconnect. You are the only one who can set your foot down and allow, or disallow, anything from monopolizing your time and energy.
If one area of your life is pulling too hard and causing turmoil in another area, take some quiet time for some personal reflection. Ask yourself some questions. Firstly, is this a temporary situation, or is becoming more and more a way of life?
There are many times in our lives and many different circumstances where we do have to divert our resources, especially time, disproportionately to a specific area. When this is going to ultimately benefit the whole, it can usually be justified.
But beware of the trap. Too many people have put too much effort and focus into one part of their life (job for example) and end up with lifelong regrets. Don’t expect a spouse or children to have the same perspective as you do, if they feel neglected or abandoned.
If you can see that the demands of one are negatively affecting others, and it is not a short-term situation, draw a line in the sand and stick to it. There’s no need to feel overwhelmed if you take control and prioritize your life.
Ask for Help
When we get pushed around by life and pulled in every direction, the overwhelm is real. It’s easy to gripe and complain and feel discontent with how things are going, without actually doing anything to effect change. We often overlook the concept of asking for help, when it might just be what will reel us back in and set us back on solid ground.
It’s okay to ask for help. Stop the train when things get too hectic. You aren’t a superhero and placing unrealistic expectations on yourself causes more harm than good. Whatever aspect of your life is bogging you down, delegate some of those duties and take the strain off of yourself. If you are spent, it’s impossible to give the best of yourself to anyone.
Get help. People are usually more than happy to help others. It’s human nature to be of service; how do you think you started feeling overwhelmed in the first place?
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Call a Time-Out
You’ve got to take time out for self-care. It sounds completely impractical, no doubt about it. How could you possibly run off and go to a concert when you’ve got so much work to catch up on, the house is a mess, you’ve got laundry up to your ears and you haven’t seen your lover in a week even though you live in the same house? Because it’s essential.
You have to take care of yourself before you can take care of anyone or anything else, otherwise, you're delivering a substandard product. When you only have a fraction of yourself to give, how can you possibly give your very best? Take some time for you and only you. Even if it’s hiding in your closet reading a book for 30 minutes, do it.