Communication, the lifeblood of any relationship, comes in various styles – passive, aggressive, passive-aggressive, and assertive. The healthiest and most beneficial for relationship-building is the assertive style. Conversely, aggressive communication, often destructive, can potentially ruin relationships.
Aggressive communication is a behavior that can occur in response to provocation or even without any external triggers. Some individuals may be inclined towards this communication style, believing it to be a part of their personality. However, it's essential to realize that changing such behavior can significantly improve personal relationships and overall quality of life.
Identifying Aggressive Communication
Aggressive communicators often create discord and lose the respect and trust of others. Narcissists and bullies are frequently found to resort to this style, gaining a sense of power by being the aggressor. This behavior is, more often than not, a facade to cover their insecurities or fears.
Consider the following indicators of aggressive communication:
Excessive Emotional Responses
Aggressive communication usually involves heightened emotions, replacing calmness with fear, anger, and hurt, particularly when one is being verbally attacked.
Lack of Tolerance and Empathy
Aggressive communicators aim to dominate conversations, ignoring the rights of others to express their beliefs or opinions. Empathy and consideration for the other person's well-being are usually absent in such situations.
Belittling Others for Self-Elevation
Aggression in communication often stems from fear and insecurity. Aggressors may believe they need to assert themselves over others to regain control and alleviate their negative emotions. This could involve belittling someone else to feel more superior.
Emotional Explosions – Shouting, Yelling, and Crying
Aggressive communication may include loud verbal outbursts, sometimes coupled with tears, to induce guilt in the other person or instill fear through shouting. Such emotional eruptions are designed to assert dominance over the other person.
Dominating Arguments
A characteristic sign of aggressive communication is the ‘winner takes all' scenario during disagreements. The aggressor usually ends up getting their way, leaving the other person with no choice but to comply with their demands.
High-Stress Levels
Aggressive communication can result in significant stress for the person on the receiving end, as they have to deal with the negative emotions generated during the argument.
Propagation of Conflict
Aggressive communication often originates from stimuli that provoke a highly emotional response in the aggressor, compelling them to dominate the other person. However, instead of resolving the situation, this behavior may create additional, and often unnecessary, conflict.
Conclusion
Aggressive communication is considered a form of verbal abuse and can be detrimental to relationships. Switching from an aggressive style to a healthier mode of communication is crucial for fostering better relationships and facilitating productive discussions.
