Do you believe that your value as a person is equivalent to how successful you are? Do you fear taking action or keep delaying executing your plans, because you're simply afraid to fail? If you tend to think this way, chances are, you are a perfectionist.
That’s not in itself a bad thing or a good thing. It depends on how it affects you. If it affects you negatively, you need to learn how to tone down your need for perfection. Some people believe that being a perfectionist will make them more successful, and therefore, they see it as an admirable trait that's worth cultivating.
The sheer determination that a perfectionist can have is truly admirable. If only that was all, then it would be healthy. However, when their expectations aren’t met – which is often – that drive can turn into something very negative. They may cause emotional harm to themselves or others, or they may simply stop moving forward at all.
Striving for the perfect life, or thinking you have to be perfect, doesn’t necessarily make your life a happy one. Trying to live a perfect life can be unhealthy, physically and emotionally, and cause you constant stress and unhappiness.
It certainly would be nice to be perfect in our own minds, and it is probably true to say that we all want our life to be a happy one. We all have something we desire that we believe will make our life perfect. It could be that if we lost weight we would attract the partner we desire, or perhaps a better job will give us more money for the freedoms we seek financially.
Whatever it may be, if we strive to be perfect we could make everything we want happen and become ultimately happy. Really? Could this be true? The answer is NO.
We do not have to wait for our life to be perfect in order to be happy right now. Can we be happy now? The answer is YES. You can be happy right now even if your situation is less than perfect.
A perfectionist has the best intentions. They want to give their best effort in reaching a goal, but instead of taking action, their fears can paralyze them and lead to inaction. In their worry, they behave in counterproductive ways. They may constantly procrastinate (even if they know exactly what to do and how to do it), feel unworthy and doubtful, and not take action at all.
Perfectionists can be so filled with doubt that they don’t believe they deserve the success and happiness they're seeking. They don't realize that they can achieve anything they set their minds to.
When viewed objectively perfectionism is usually regarded as a negative trait. It is recognized that its effects can be damaging to a person’s overall physical and mental well-being. It is why, if you are a perfectionist, it can make you and your life very unhappy.
Unlock Your Full Potential: Explore our Personal Development Checklists
Put Perfectionism Aside and Be Happy Now
Perfectionism is a choice. Happiness is a choice. You must make the decision to be happy. It will not be as simple as saying, ‘I want to be happy’, but that is still a good start. As much as you want to be happy, there will always be circumstances that will bring you unhappiness, and that is life.
So put your perfectionism aside and be happy right now! Tomorrow, or next month, is not a guarantee. You do not have to wait for your life to be perfect in order to be happy. If you can accept that life will never be perfect and that unhappiness is a part of life, then your life will become better, faster. With that mindset, happiness will find you instead of you chasing it.
If being a perfectionist is deeply rooted in you, then you need to address the problems right now. Rember, you don't need to be perfect to be happy. Make it your mantra! Other important things and people matter more in your life.
Think about this for a moment. If you cannot make yourself happy now as a perfectionist, how will your life be happier in the future? If nothing changes, nothing changes. Perfectionism destroys happiness, so work on overcoming it as quickly as possible to achieve inner peace and happiness.